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One of the things I loved about working with midwives is that each visit lasted 45 minutes. From your sex life to your diet, midwives are very thorough. I have parallel care with an MD for blood work; however, I opted out of most testing. I never had an ultrasound or many of the other recommended tests, because I was committed to having my child, no matter what might be wrong with him/her. My good friend was also pregnant at the time, and she had a horrible pregnancy of constant worry and trips to the bay area for level 2 ultrasounds. She was told her child might have down’s syndrome, then was told the baby only had half a kidney. In the end, her daughter was born healthy, but I remember at the time thinking, there could be something wrong with my baby, and I wouldn’t know it. It turns out I was right.
Early in my first trimester, I got very sick with a fever (one of the hazards of being a teacher). I went from this illness to morning sickness, and lost 12 pounds those first three months. Again, the doctor and midwives were concerned I wouldn’t gain weight, but I did in the end, grossing 45 extra pounds. During my sixth month, I started having contractions. They felt a little bit more serious than Braxton-Hicks, so my midwives sentenced me to one hour of bedrest in the morning, and one hour in the afternoon. I was convinced this baby was coming early; he was five days late.
Almost seven years ago, I gave birth to my daughter. My pregnancy began with really bad “all day” sickness in the first trimester, where I would watch Dr. Zhivago between trips to the bathroom to puke. My second trimester was grand, as I was big enough to look pregnant and not just fat, and I felt really good. I had the glow. The third trimester was a challenge, as I gained 55 pounds overall and cried when I couldn’t squat long enough to plant my onions. Then, exactly on her due date, my daughter entered the world.
We live in a very remote region of Northern California. Our closest hospital (that won’t do births) is an hour and half away. Our midwives would not take the risk of a home birth at our off-the-grid homestead, nor did we feel entirely comfortable with the idea, so we decided rent a house in town for our birth. A couple was going to Senegal for the summer, so it worked out perfectly that we could use their home for a month. It was about 15 minutes from the closest hospital, although no hospitals on the coast have an neo-natal intensive care unit. I wanted a home birth, and this was the closest I could get to one.
Everyone feared I would go into labor in the mountains, so several days before my due date, we went to town to wait it out. I was restless and knew I would never go into labor in town, so we returned home. I went for a long hike, and that night the real contractions began. I was walking down our driveway as my husband pulled up, and I said, I think it is time to go. My mother was here, but I feared her driving on the mountain roads, and we needed to take two cars for our dog to accompany us to town and fit everyone. So, I drove myself in labor two hours to the house we rented. My mother and I timed my contractions, but even though they were five minutes apart, I kept on driving (that’s how much I fear my mother’s driving!).
Any mother knows, birthing a child is a labor of love. Inspired by a discussion amongst the writers on Eco Child’s Play about our births and the safety of home births in particular, we decided to share our labor experiences with our readers. One of the things we hold in common as eco parents is our desire for a natural birth, however, we may not always experience the birth we envisioned. From VBACS to home water births, our experiences are diverse, and we want to share them with you. We believe what is important about birth is that parents are given an educated choice about how and where their baby is born, as well as be flexible to deal with any medical issues that arise.
We don’t only want to tell our birth stories; we want to hear your stories too! As a pregnant woman, I could not read or hear enough women’s birth stories, because they were all unique and different. The experience is not the same for any two women. By sharing our stories, we hope to build a community of parents who can support and share with one another. Therefore, we are hosting a Labor of Love contest!
